Mastering Intensity is the Key to Staying in the Game

One of the biggest leadership myths is that intensity is either “good” or “bad.” It tends to get labeled as hustle, grind, pressure or obsession and it is assumed it inevitably leads to burnout. Or we are told that some parts of life will always be intense, while other parts never see that level of commitment.

I want you to know intensity itself isn’t the enemy. It is only when unmanaged that intensity becomes a threat. Whether you’re leading a business, raising a family, evolving your identity, or rebuilding after a setback, intensity is part of the deal. The difference is not whether intensity exists but whether you’ve learned to turn it on and off.

A useful mindset is how do I master intensity so I can use it to live my best life? View intensity as fuel to help you achieve growth, create momentum and make progress. This is not limited to your business but applies to all areas of your life: health, marriage, family & friendships, personal development and your inner world.

Sometimes all it takes is ten minutes of intensity in the right place to shift an entire outcome. Ten focused minutes in exercise can radically change the quality of a forty-minute workout. Ten minutes of fully present connection can change the energy of an entire evening at home.

Intensity mastery gives you options

Intensity doesn’t have to be constant, but it does have to be intentional. Mastery will look different every day, every week, every month and that’s the point. When you learn to use intensity deliberately, you gain a whole new level of adjustment, control, and flexibility. You stop being owned by the pressure around you and start becoming intentional and conscious of how you want to act.

You are aiming for balance and intensity as partners, both curated uniquely by you. Take responsibility for your every action just as you would the accelerator and the brake when driving a car. Anticipating what each situation requires whilst you stay conscious of your intention as you navigate each day and all areas of your life.

Intensity is best achieved when you train yourself just like when you train to be fit. It works best with structure and discipline but always requires self-reflection.

A practical way to master intensity is to treat it like gears.

1st Gear: Maintain
Low intensity. Stable output. Focus on consistency, routines, health, and relationships.

2nd Gear: Build
Moderate intensity. Strategic focus. You’re progressing, executing, improving.

3rd Gear: Sprint
High intensity. Short bursts only. Deadlines, launches, turnarounds, transformations.
Decompression is not a luxury, it is leadership, proven by many successful people adopting little rituals to help them regulate their intensity.
Micro pauses between meetings.
End-of-day shutdown routines.
Yoga, meditation, or breathwork.
Exercise that helps de-escalate.
Writing stuff down to clear the mental load.
A weekly recalibration block with no performance agenda.

When you decompress with purpose, you train your nervous system to transition continually, making sure you stay fluid and in your ease.\

Staying in the Game

Intensity is a tool to help with balance that works exceptionally well when harnessed, timed, and supported by recovery. If balance is the rhythm, intensity is the beat and when you learn to manage both together, something powerful happens: You stop living in reaction to pressure — and start leading with capacity.

Some things you might consider:

1. Where in your life are you running a sprint (3rd gear) when you should be in maintain (1st gear)
2. What part of your life is starved of intensity, not because it matters less, but because you’ve stopped prioritising it?
3. What would change if you treated decompression as a non-negotiable part of leadership rather than a reward at the end?