Is There Anywhere Better Than Jeremy Clarkson’s Pub?
An article caught me eye the other day entitled “I Ate At Jeremy Clarkson’s Farm 90 Minutes From Wales, Two Words Sum Up The Whole Experience”. I read the whole article and it was longer than two words. There was also no two word summary. For the sake of accuracy the title should instead be “I ate at Jeremy Clarkson’s pub and you’ll never guess what I didn’t put in this article”.
This is before even getting into the fact the middle half of the title is dedicated to its minute distance from Wales. This to me reads as “Shut-in Journalist Believes Short Commute Newsworthy, Ecstatic at Opportunity To Share”. In his defence it was written for Wales Online, so maybe every article has to justify it’s relevance to Wales. I heard that Benjamin Netanyahu, a 56 hour and 30 minute drive from Wales is getting up to some real dicey business at the moment.
The pub, called The Farmer’s Dog has been pumping since it opened, with queues of cars buggering up the Oxfordshire countryside. Bookings are necessary if you don’t want to chance it waiting around outside, but once you’re in everything’s smooth and professional. The vibes are good, the food is good, and signs around the place let you know which meat came from which local farmer. They’re all in on supporting local where they can, and in an increasingly globalised market, that’s to be commended. But is this it? Is this all there is to life? Eating at a place on the offchance Jeremy Clarkson walks past. Yes, yes it is, I’m sorry if you were looking for more purpose in life go find God or dig a well in Africa.
So say you’ve gone all the way to The Farmer’s Dog, had some good food, what next? Well 90 minutes from the Farmer’s Dog is Wales, home of bad article titles and seven Michelin Star restaurants. Here are the best experiences you can have without the chance of ending up on a TV show, apart from maybe TMZ paparazzi stuff.
The Whitebrook
Serving quintessential british cuisine The Walnut relies on locally produced meat and vege supplemented by foraged ingredients from the countryside. The building itself dates back to the 17th century, and also has the distinction of having the longest held michelin star in Wales. Although things get messy with that since it closed in 2013 and picked up it’s new owner later that year with it’s new owner Chris Harrod, who quickly regained its star the next year. So does it still count? I think it should. The menu is completely seasonal based on the kitchen garden but one of the signature dishes is a suckling pig themed dish incorporating a pork shoulder which is cooked over two days in a bain-marie. I’m getting hungry just thinking about it.
The Walnut Tree
The walnut tree has been hosting people in one way or another since the 60s. It previously held a Michelin star in 2002 under head chef Stephen Terry, but lost it upon his departure in 2004. It had an addled history after that, with it appearing on Gordon Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares and ultimately going into insolvency in 2007, with the owners taking potshots at Ramsay on their way out the door. The new owner WIlliam Griffith and head chef Shaun Hill turned it around the very next year, earning accolades everywhere before finally getting it’s Michelin star returned in 2010, which it has held ever since.
Shaun Hill, much like Gareth Ward at Ynyshir just makes food he likes. If you like it, you’re going to make it the best you can. This is why we get uni students to make big macs. The meals are contemporary and are subversively simple in their presentation. Local beef and game, British fish and seafood and some fine French cheeses are used. The à la carte menu and set menus change every day, but based on local availability you might need to call ahead if there’s something you have your heart set on.
Two cottages next door are available for guests who really want their own little slice of relaxation. One is the converted post office from back in the day. While you enjoy your time here you’ll be based right on the edge of the Brecon Beacons National Park. So take some time to ramble and take in the fresh air.
Ynyshir
With two michelin stars Ynyshir is the creme dela creme of fine dining in Wales. Ed Sheeran, famous for being an upwardly mobile ginger, recently ate there and had a reportedly good time. Prices start at £385 a head and bookings need to be made two months in advance. The place is run by Gareth Ward and specialises in Japanese. It’s noted that the experience is not suitable for those with food allergies, intolerances, and dislikes. “Every single person in the room probably wants to eat something totally different, so I’ve got this theory of just please yourself. I love coming to work in the morning, I’m 100% happy with every single thing in the kitchen – and I’m having loads of fun.” Gareth told our favourite Wales based publication Wales Online.
Arrival can be made by private helicopter if you have one at your disposal. You can only attend during the week between Tuesday and Friday. Guests can stay a night but the dining experience starts for everyone at 5:15pm. In the morning they’ll bring you a light breakfast before sending you on your way.