Never Waste A Crisis
You might’ve heard the famous phrase, ‘never waste a crisis’. Though more commonly used in economic circles, it seems particularly fitting of our current situation, when considering the impact Covid-19 is having on our mental health.
As a group dedicated to helping Kiwi men live happier, healthier and longer lives, the idea of enforced distancing from our friends and whānau was, admittedly at first, a little at odds with Movember – who has always encouraged men to regularly reach out, catch-up and most importantly, check in on the health and wellbeing of their mates.
Of course, the most important thing all New Zealanders can do right now in lockdown is practice physical distancing. This is, without a doubt, our greatest hope to slow the spread of the coronavirus, and to ensure our healthcare system can best care for those in the greatest need.
That said, being physically distant isn’t an excuse for Kiwi men to simply tap out on their wellbeing and that of their mates. Falling back on the comfortable masculine norms of skirting around issues and talking face to face at the local pub or on the footy field are just not plausible in the near future. And as men, we need to adapt.
There’s been plenty of commentary about the negative ways in which this pandemic will impact our health, and these effects are being felt all around us. Stress and anxiety caused by unemployment, social isolation and financial distress are either all here or on the horizon for many Kiwi lads. While, for this same group of at-risk men, their safe avenues of contact and connection are slipping away.
Dr. Zac Seidler, Movember’s global director of mental health, says statistics reliably show that men have fewer close friends than women and that these numbers steeply drop off as guys reach fatherhood and head into retirement.
“As dads are faced with the prospect of working from home surrounded by kids, and older men can’t go out to their local footy club for some banter, we’ll have to make do with what we have.”
Indeed, Zac says our men need to step in and take charge. “They need to make the call to look after themselves and those around them. That means finding a productive outlet for the inevitable anger and frustration at the changes in your daily life. That means putting your energy into home renos, cleaning or looking after the kids to ease the pressure on your partner, who might be struggling with their own monumental balancing act. That means checking in with those more vulnerable, those less fortunate in your community, to see where you can lend a hand. That means accepting that while there might not be a solution for a problem just yet, there’s still a way to utilise your strengths to build up those around you.”
There’s no denying the coming months are going to be difficult as we navigate a world turned upside down. Yet, while the prospect of level 4 lockdown was initially met with only concern for our mental and physical wellbeing, I’m witnessing so many unexpected ways in which this period of physical distancing is, in fact, having a positive impact on our lives.
While this certainly doesn’t discount the very real challenges we are all facing, at the same time, there are so many healthy habits, both physically and mentally, that are emerging in the home, our neighbourhoods and in our new makeshift work environments by way of this lockdown – valuable tools and learnings that I hope live on long after the restrictions are lifted.
Simply just reflecting on the changes in my own humble abode, I’m sure I’m not alone when I say, in many ways, daily life feels stripped back to basics. Some things which we’d simply forgotten to prioritise or make time for previously are now a fundamental part of our days.
Home:
Cooking: Re-discovering the joys of whipping up a hearty meal, and better yet, enjoying it with the family around the dinner table, each and every night.
Entertainment: I’m sure, like many parents in my position, the thought of busying the kids for four weeks at home was a little daunting, but we’re finding plenty of wholesome activities to do around the house. As a family we’ve blown the cobwebs off a fair few boardgames and cracked out the cards and art supplies – and of course, peppered in screen time, which I don’t feel an ounce of guilt about. Put simply though, where we once might’ve resorted to spending money on a treat out or a trip to the movies to, we’re finding fun in true family connection.
Health:
Move: While leaving the office for some fresh air under ordinary circumstances once seemed impossible, suddenly long days cooped up at your make-shift home office are now broken up with a walk, a run or a bike ride with the family.
Fluid work hours: While managing the kids can be a juggle, how great is it that we can fulfil our work obligations while also packing in bike rides and board games. A little adjustment now could change the way businesses operate around families in the future.
Take some time out: We are in the middle of a pandemic, not a productivity contest. People aren’t feeling guilty about taking some time out – reading, meditating, watching a Netflix series. There’s no better time to invest in what makes you feel good, and people are embracing it.
Community:
Modern tech: Thanks to apps like Zoom and House Party, we can also bring that ‘doing’ style of support to social distancing. We can build things together while on the phone or laptop, from puzzles to cabinets. There are plenty of guys out there setting up weekly happy hours with their mates and a beer over the phone, or long-lost friends reconnecting on social media.
Connecting with our neighbours: People are aware of their duty of care to their neighbours and are looking out for one another, be it leaving care packages with baked bread on front doorsteps or hosting virtual dinner parties. I’m sure for many, they feel more connected to their neighbours than ever before.
For all the positive changes, there’s no denying this period will still have its challenges, which is why it’s so important we continue to look after ourselves and each other. Old habits are tough to shake, but if a period of lockdown and physical distancing forces us to change, then that change can be for the better. And if we come out the other side with stronger communities, greater connection to family and efficiencies in our work, then that can only be a great thing for our health and wellbeing. Indeed, never waste a crisis.