The Democratic Cocktail

Utter the syllables; “Piña Colada” and, if you’re like me, you will immediately sink back onto your bar stool like it was a deckchair on the sun-drenched balcony of some luxury island resort overlooking the azure waters of a tropical lagoon. Such is the power of pleasant memories, Tom Cruise movies and cheesy-yet-iconic Rupert Holmes songs.

Yet this idyllic auto-suggested scene is only part of the story of this marvelous cocktail, as it is also a lasting symbol of Democracy. And not the bizarre Frankenstein’s monster abominations of democracy we endure today, where the leader of a defeated political party is handed the reins of power by the leader of an another even less popular party. Or where 400 million incredibly diverse citizens can only choose between two aged white billionaires for their president. I’m talking about the real deal; 100% pure Pirate Democracy.

You see, during the “Golden Age” of Piracy during the 17th and 18th Centuries, some pirate captains ran their – or what was until recently, someone else’s – ships by democratic means. Captains were elected by popular vote amongst the crew and every member of that crew got to vote and an equal share of any plundered booty. A far cry from what anyone who wasn’t male, white and of the landed class – and, strangely enough, quite a few matched this description at the time – could expect from life. So, it is of little wonder that many women and Africans (it is estimated that fully a third of the 10,000 or so Golden Era pirates were ex-slaves) seized the opportunity to become buccaneers. There really wasn’t much in it for them playing by the rules of the North American polite society game.

Of course, the true source of the Piña Colada is shrouded in competing marketing backstories, but one thread has the Puerto Rican pirate Roberto CofresÍ giving his crew rum mixed with pineapple and coconut juice to celebrate the capture of a vessel in the Caribbean. Considering that pirates had plentiful rum and access to shipping from Central and South America where pineapple and coconut were sourced in that part of the world – then this tale is certainly feasible.

So, I urge you to now raise your glass in toast to the last true Democracy the world has ever seen. And sincerely hope it surely won’t be the last.

PIÑA COLADA

1 part white rum
1 part coconut cream
3 parts pineapple juice

Mix with crushed ice in blender until smooth, then pour into a chilled glass, garnish and serve.