Land Of The Long White Everything – Turkmenbashi’s Marble Masterpiece
And in more hot Guinness Book of Records news; Turkmenistani capital Ashgabat has finally lifted the prestigious title of World’s Highest Density of White Marble-clad Buildings. After a fierce competition that’s raged for at least a couple of millennia, Ashgabat wrenched the title from the grasp of divisional heavyweights like Agra, Washington, Athens and Rome.
But, with its staggering tally of 543 new buildings featuring a total of 4,513,584 square metres of gleaming pristine white marble, who can dare deny Ashgabat its well-earned due? Plus, while Rome and Athens took centuries to stockpile all their white marble masterpieces like the Parthenon and Pantheon, Ashgabat has pumped theirs out in a comparative heartbeat.
Designed to Intimidate
The brainchild of founding Turkmenistan president Saparmurat Niyazov, aka ‘Turkmenbashi’, who had the vision to build a glittering white citadel of hope from the rubble of the failed Turkmen Soviet Socialist Republic. After he declared Turkmenistan independent from the collapsed Soviet Union in 1991, Turkmenbashi got stuck into the white marble for a new look capital that would help underline his nation’s break from its sinister past.
It started with a simple marble zhoosh of existing Soviet-era buildings but, liking the new clean ‘pure’ look, Turkmenbashi started tearing down the old and replacing it with an exciting, albeit Albert Speer-like, totalitarian New. The buildings got grander and grander, increasingly designed for ideals rather than people so Ashgabat is now filled with impressively wide boulevards, empty plazas and massive white marble edifices – that no one uses.
Awesome Monuments
Some of these buildings are genuinely awe-inspiring however, including; the Monument of Neutrality, this 95m arch celebrates Turkmenistan’s official policy of neutrality – no mean feat when neighbouring Putin’s Russia! – and features a 12 metre gold statue to Turkmenbashi himself. Which also used to rotate to face the sun. Pharaoh complex anyone?
Across town is the Independence Monument; a 118m column symbolising the five Turkmen tribes and also housing a museum. Possibly the most photogenic of them all is the Bagt Koshgi or Wedding Palace which is shaped like an eight-pointed star and topped off with a globe map of Turkmenistan. Another garnering its own entry in the Guinness Book of Records is the Alem Cultural and Entertainment Centre which boasts the world’s largest indoor Ferris wheel.
If any of these stunning buildings were in New York, London, Tokyo or even Shanghai the world would never stop marvelling over them. The fact they’re in Turkmenistan means that they slip between the cracks for most people as, certainly in the West, despite the Monument to Neutrality, we do tend to regard the Central Asian republics as sort of Russian lackeys. Thus, not the usual stop on the tourist cruise ship tour circuit…
White (Cars) Only
Of course Turkmenistan’s leaders haven’t helped encourage a mass influx of tourists into the country by coming up with some of the most bizarre by-laws of all time for Ashgabat’s streets. Turkmenbashi’s successor Gurbanguly Berdimuhamedow loved the look of white marble so much he went a step further – and made white the mandatory colour for all cars in the capital. Well, you could still, in theory, drive a black car around Ashgabat but then you would be stopped by the police, your car impounded and only retrievable if you pay a fee equivalent to six months’ salary. Plus, you will also have to sign a pledge vowing to have your car repainted white – which can cost another six months’ salary from the local car spray-painters in on the scheme.
Um, why?
President Berdimuhamedow has never been crystal clear on why only white-painted cars are acceptable in Turkmenistan’s capital, only offering vague excuses like light-coloured cars stay cleaner-looking in a desert environment and a uniform colour scheme keeps the city looking more orderly. But, seeing as he also instructed his police force to fine any owner driving a dirty car around town, it kinda makes it look like it’s a purely personal crusade. But, when you control the purse strings of the world’s fourth largest natural gas supply, you get to make up whatever wacky rules you like. Including banning young men from having beards or long hair and having your son take over as president after you.
The beard ban is particularly perplexing as Turkmenistan is a predominantly Muslim country and beard-growing is often seen as a sign of piety within that faith. But Turkmenistan is similar to other ex-Soviet Central Asian states like Tajikistan and Uzbekistan in this regard where the Soviet era governments were so authoritarian in their rule in the past that religious orders took a backseat to central governmental policy. Thus, the personality cults around the leaders of countries in this part of the world take precedence over even the words of imams and/or bishops.
Ashgabat: proof that absolute power doesn’t corrupt absolutely; it just gets whitewashed first.